King Tides….

King tide is a colloquial term for an especially high tide, such as a perigean spring tide. “King tide” is not a scientific term, nor is it used in a scientific context.
When there is an especially high tide, there is usually and equally low tide.
This is how my journey has been feeling recently. I haven’t written for awhile as I just haven’t had the energy or time. Have had some major highs and exceptional lows.
When I did my degree back in the days I did a short paper of sport psych. I learnt back then about setting too higher goals and what could happen with that. Well, any goal really.
Have you ever felt like this? Set a goal, work real hard for it and when you finally reach it you are either real happy and excited or a bit meh. Then you crash, and get super low?  That’s me and I always do it!  Not just in sport either, study, work, life…
You see it proves that it is the journey that is important and not the outcome. You spend all that time working really hard on achieving the goal, so many ups and downs, challenges, late nights and all.  The learning is in there, not the outcome.  This is exactly what I have been trying to work on, being present, mindful of all those little lessons.  What use is something after the fact? Or in the future? The present is most important as you can never recreate that scenario, the mood, time, etc….
Its been four months since I had my baby Hinatea. And I have actually achieved a lot and I am in really good shape considering. I see that now. But it took me awhile. I have a tendency to set really high expectations for myself, as we all generally do.
I managed to qualify at Regionals for Waka Ama sprints, my main goal while I was hapu (pregnant). And then I  made the semi finals at Nationals, just 3 months after baby was born.   Then I ended up paddling at one of the biggest changeover paddle races here in NZ, (Takapuna Beach Cup) 42km with a crew and we came third and scored a bronze medal. Next day I paddled the 24km Relay with my good friend (we have done this race for 3 years) and we made the podium again with a Gold! So pretty happy with that. And these were things that were not on my list, participation yes but not podium.
Another thing I am guilty of is not celebrating the achievement. So this time around I have hung my gold medal up on my rear vision mirror in my car to remind me daily not only of that success but everything else leading up to it.
I guess what I am trying to say is  I learnt a lot of stuff from that weekend of racing, about myself, what makes me tick, and priorities.
It was a pretty stressful weekend to start with, family wise. It made me rethink how I balance my family and my love for paddling and competition. I refuse to give up and I am determined to find a way.  I know every other paddler probably feels the same.  Whenever anything happens to me now, before reacting or overreacting I say to myself five little words and it really helps, “It is what it is”. It really helps me to put perspective on whats going on, and calm my farm before I lose it.
To finish I remind myself daily of some key words from a poem brought to my attention from an Evening with Oprah, (Invictus, William E Henley), “I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul”.

On the way to gold Takapuna Beach Cup.

Thank you all for your support and for listening, this has been really helpful in my journey.
Much aroha
Hiria 🙂
#imagine #believe #achieve